Now would be a great time to stop wondering " Who let the dogs out" and go to sleep
Any time you start making pro wrestling references before 10 PM I know that I'm breaking up a fight between you and some muscled up frat boy you call Hogan.
how are you gonna miss the world cup? other than the olympics it's our last way to assert our dominance over China after this economic bull shit
just snorted lines off a mancala board. I'm destined to win this game.
Would it be a dick move to report the suite next-door for a noise violation? They're singing Bad Romance off-key and I'm not sure if I can allow that.
You should get with him and swear you have to use lambskin condoms. That'll test his veganism.
i seriously just licked my laptop for traces of blow from the other night
And she was like "I wanted you all for myself, to love you, and treat you like gold."... See this is why I shouldn't fuck Italian chicks...
I am so proud of him. After eating the rest of our shrooms, he finally registered to vote
And fyi howling is not an acceptable form of communication.
I'm pricing out a roll of that wax butcher paper. We fuck too messy and I can't afford to wash them every afternoon.
Sorry, I was trapped in a small closet behind a washer. What's up?
I got about 15 snapchats from you with your hand saying "you want cheese sticks" or something like that and one of some weird looking weed
there was a keg and pinata at my uncles funeral, and a bunch of scary looking biker dudes showed up to pay their respects. i need to strive to be more like him.
Im so unlucky if I fell in a barrel of dicks, I'd come our sucking my thumb
Randomize
