But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
you had a panic attack, pissed yourself, and started crying. you never go above the kiddie level of my lil bros schools haunted house ever again.
round 2?
EVER.
mike has just informed me of all the things he would put in his pussy if he was a woman. this includes door stops, power drills & g.i. joes.
"and then my dad would be all like 'hey mike, where's the remote?'"
We can smell you smoking weed from downstairs and your little brother is asking why the upstairs smells like gasoline. Please smoke in the basement. XOXO dad.
My goal for tonight: make tomorrow as awkward as humanly possible.
Do you remember trying to use a pencil, pen, and sunglasses as your second form of ID at the bar when they wouldn't let you in last night?
All I remember was endless tequila and pulling karate moves from 3 Ninjas Kick Back towards the guy at 7 Eleven. Explanation?
Maybe just the first 2 wks of Nov can be dick detox.
Dude, it's not gay. It's winter.
CODE RED CODE RED MY VIBRATOR IS BROKEN THIS IS NOT A DRILL
We laughed, we cried, we fucked, we shirked our familial and work related responsibilities. They could make a movie about the last 40 hours of our lives.
The best part about theater chicks is nothing is too cliche or out of line. I just fucked her Braveheart style in my entry way while saying goodbye.
I had to ask my mom to look for my kegle ball...
The expiration date on my 40 is the same day as my 21st birthday
Randomize
