Decided to write a book called "girls don't poop and other myths I wish I still believed in"
i think i want to fuck a midget just to see how difficult it would be
Maybe you should have studied instead of worrying about who is going to have sex with you
had a convo with my professor before class while peeing... new level of awkward or a breakthrough in our relationship? i feel like there is no longer a professional boundary.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
about to tell this girl that sh'es my teenage dream. you have 15.358s to stop me.
Kill yourself wednesday started off with a bang, and im pretty sure im still drunk from tequila tuesday.
Btw, I'm creating an event on fb to celebrate the one yr anniversary since we went to jail.
She asked if i could guess "what shape her carpet was". I got it wrong (christmas tree).
I realize designer coke was a douchey thing to say but the point of the story is I did bath salts
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He posted a picture from Senor Frogs. I don't remember where that bikini came from and my sombrero is PERPENDICULAR. Safe to say it was one hell of a day
Well. At least he's a gentleman. A gentleman satanist.
I mean. I just want to sit in my bed and eat bagels. What's wrong with that?
I woke up with what has to be a whole pack of smarties loose in my bra. Was that your fault?
Irony: drinking your pre workout supplement out of the cup your Krispy Kreme doughnut holes came in.
I was watchin a porno and I sware I saw that dude at the bar at applebees the other night
Randomize