Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
I have an asthmatic alcoholic for a roommate. That can't be safe.
Cuz last time you told me I was going to be shocked about something you got a hand job from a stripper in canada
COME GET ME FR THE HOSPIGAL'!!!!!
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barely 48 hours and I've done the dirty on both of my roommates beds before they've even slept in them
I'm on day 4 of clean eating. I call it the "whore by June" program
I did a kegel this morning to determine if I had been penetrated during last night's blackout. Nope.
We were all day drunk by 2pm. Now I know why they hate Americans
he sneezed into my face mid-kiss
Bless his heart
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If I get one more "oh yaaaaa he changed your oil" texts, I'm gonna lose my shit
The guy I hooked up with last night left me alone with his dog AND IT JUST SHIT ON THE FLOOR. WHAT DO I DO
Do you think if I had a tempurpedic bed he would still be able to feel me fingering myself after we have sex?
I feel like him using the excuse "I'm not a fan of lying" to stop me from sleeping around is hypocritical since he's cheating on his wife with me.
You said "I feel like a koala bear. Do you ever just feel like a koala bear?" This is your brain on drugs.
I remember is someone saying "I smell weed" and then having a room full of sober high school kids look at me.
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