First guy to fuck a girl in the new tool shed. Her underwear is on the shovel hook.
I'm crawling around naked in my room looking for my hairbrush. Just thought I'd put that image in your head.
How did the whale quest end up? I saw u hit a little snag when the first one heard you call her that.
Because if the best sex I've ever had was with a gay guy, then God help me.
Seriously, dude... You knows its bad when you gag on her nipple.
I think i just threw up blood. i can't chill right now;
I would feel bad sleeping with her unless all of her personalities were on board with it.
Last time we had a party like that I woke up naked on the pool table with a chalk outline around me and a empty bottle of jager duct taped to my hand.
Yea. I'm excited about this party too
I put tequila in my salad dressing yesterday. Step the fuck up.
I just got into the cab. It smells like weed and the driver looks like someone who may or may not be really talented at playing the saxophone. He also asked me my thoughts on porn when I told him I'm an actor. I might not make it home.
im In safeway buying a bottle of Ciroc in short shorts at 3:00 pm on a Monday, yeah I don't know either.
went to their party, left halfway through to fuck a pledge, came back to keep drinking. I think everyone won.
All I'm saying is this is the exact reason I should not be left unsupervised.
Never thought I'd see the day when I got assless chaps in the mail, and yet here we are...
One of my nipples looks nothing like the other...i don't know how this happened
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