his prince albert piercing just severely cut the roof of my mouth. can you pick me up at the hospital if he drops me off?
he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
his cum tasted like old pizza and looked like old milk
Sometimes to bang a cougar u gotta play wii With her kids
Hands down, the girl passed out in the bathroom was the best looking. Concious or not.
you just kept yelling NO BUENO SENOR at the cashier and throwing coins at him, of course you were going to get kicked out of the grocery store
Just remember that she is a giant dick-sucking forehead and you are better than that.
Three people drank on "never have I had sex in a tractor." Iowa at its best?
She asked me to go inside, make myself a drink and slip into something a little more naked.
I just lit a candle in my room using axe and a lighter, that's how bored I am. Let's get schwasted.
And have you ever tried to explain a hickey to your own grandmother?
I'm high and I have a consensual booty call on the way and just thought that it was a good time to let you know that I think that you are a stellar person.
So in my DUI class I had to write down 3 people I'd call if I needed to talk and why...they all want to meet you now...
She has no problem going ass to mouth, but won't eat the pizza crust. I don't get it.
He offered to dress his dick up as Charlie Chaplin to cheer me up.
Keep him.
Randomize
