My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
apparently farting at a cop is considered assault.
I just ate an adderall and jelly sandwich in front of my mom. Homework time!
she said if I bought her franzia she would blow me, and she would fuck me if I splurged on martini and rossi. Franzia it is
i am pretty sure she ate my hamster last night. i am thinking this because she left me a note that says she ate my hamster and my hamster is no longer in its hamster cage.
disregard all texts ive sent you minus taco motherfucking bell
My ex best friend's ex fuck buddy is visiting. There was no other option but day drinking.
I found out you can't leave the bar with a drink. I also found out that pouring it on the bouncers shoes is also unacceptable.
I let a naked juice spill down my leg for like 30 minutes bc i thought i was hallucinating that my leg was cold.
She said I looked exactly like my dad. Then she made out with me. Should I be questionable?
We hooked up for a while and on his way out he high fived me and said "stay weird"
Clothes make me feel like a responsible adult and that's just not something I'm ready to handle.
As I was balls deep, she moaned "i can't wait to see what how hot our daughter will be". Instant de-boner
75% of my food budget goes to wine, the rest to chips and salsa.
We have GOT to stop getting stoned and going out for expensive dinners.
Randomize
