So i've def seen the girl running for student body VP getting fingered in a bar.
She's thinkin about havin beer pong at her reception... She's walkin a fine line between trashy and the best idea ever
Just hooked up on shake weight girl's dad's porsche. What are YOU doing with your life?
Our kitchen sink faucet is leaking, so I set a pitcher under it to catch water for Kool-Aid tomorrow rather than turn on the faucet. The environment owes me.
Look, we all have our slutty phases. Mine is just forever.
it's been dubbed the summer of antibiotics
Although, I did get to see a Raiders fan and his toothless girlfriend get roughed up by the police and dragged out of the stadium. So the night wasn't a total loss.
the cops accepted 42 wallaby way Sydney. and the cops, and cab driver accepted the new address. please tell the win i am experiencing
sex on the stairs. not our finest idea.
Just bc you put "its cute" at the end of it doesn't change the fact that u have called me a vag twice this morning and its only 10:03
You went to a drug deal in a onesie.
That's probably why white girls drink so much espresso. Piledriving coke and vodka crans takes a fucking toll man
Currently having to re-watch episodes of Lost that I've only partially seen because you distracted me with your vagina
WHEN THE HELL DOES ANYTHING IN OUR LIVES *EVER* GO AS PLANNED???
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
Randomize
