he was like a christmas ornament you would hang on the back of the tree....not great but still made the cut.
another holiday season passes without receiving a dick in a box, where did i go wrong in life?
I can't get away from Pickles they're either stuck in me, in my mouth, or I'm stuck in one. fuck my whole entire life.
He just laughed at his drink laid on the floor and crawled to the bathroom
I just had to give myself a pep talk to stop lying on my floor. Literally too hung over to function
The more I stare at her and block out what she's actually saying with thoughts of what she could be saying, the more interested I become
Thats like me asking what you think of antisocial polish guys with mysterious rashes
Just called a girl a cunt over peanuts. I think we both know it wasn't just about the peanuts.
Also send boobie pics with bobs burgers in background its the only way to get me off anymore
I threw up in the shower. I cleaned it all up and there is on mess at all. This hangover has become borderline religous. Powerful and life changing.
If you gave someone an std. would you say a muffin basket, a candy gram or an edible arrangement is a better choice to send them?
If I could figure out how to do him with his wranglers on you would never see me again.
I've had pants off for 3 hours now. America.
Thanks for the hospitality last night.
You mean sex?
Yes....hospitality.
I sure hope so...I wonder if he could tell in that email that I'm really good at blow jobs. Hopefully he heard that tone. Any means necessary.
Randomize
