my orientation roommate looks just like New York of Flavor Flav fame
I'm okay.. I had a good heart to heart with the cab driver Raheem - it's going to be our year.
told our landlord the hole in the wall was from your head during drunk sex..
how did he take it?
not as well as i would have thought
Every pair of shorts I try on makes me look like some kind of powerful lesbian wizard.
That is like, the point of shorts
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You're getting spoiled, you better send me at least a side boob pic if you wanna see my dick dressed up as Davie Crockett.
Hey man, I found your crocs and your visor in the road. Got em for you.
Food poisoning on first date... Still rode the mechanical bull like a champ
So apparently someone caught him as he was falling. And carried him around the rest of the night.
I lost my bar virginty and made out with a dwarf. It was a good night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah you're weird. You once told me you would by me a house in the middle of sex. Like as you were thrusting.
I'm good. Got my nipples pierced and threw my back out. 🙌
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
It's alright. I'm just trying to make her realize you're not good enough for her.
FIVE TIMES AND I HAVENT GOTTEN OFF ONCE
literally yelled NOOOO right before he finished .. yelled “five times and I still haven’t gotten off” when he was still inside me ..
Said “don’t worry I’ll get myself off tomorrow” to top it all off
THERE IS WATER LITERALLY DRIPPING OFF OF THE CHANDELIER. I OFFICIALLY HAVE THE WORLD'S WORST RAINFALL SHOWER HEAD.
Randomize