tonight would not even compare to the night i tried to pee in the living room
I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
Most of the time people just stick whatever they want in my mouth. Thanks for letting me decide this time
finally cleaned my dorm for the first time all year. bleach is awesome.
I sat alone in Buffalo Wild Wings eating chocolate cake on Country Western karoake night. The waiter asked me if I was ok. Twice.
sleazy september. first one with mono loses.
I consider it a good night. I met Jimmy Buffet, who grabbed my ass, and I body-checked a toddler. She had it coming.
Well I'm 2 for 2 with the absinthe, I just woke up in some random car behind the bar
No our divorce decree will not have a blow job clause. Unless my alimony is greatly increased your bj's have been reduced to fantasy status.....
second attempt at shower sex: failed after the water turned orange bc of a fire up the street. this is just not meant to be
I don't remember what you were saying to me in the bathroom. But whatever it was, yes, because i remember nodding a lot.
Are you coming down for 4/20 or does Easter kinda fuck that up for you?
Yeah he drove 30 minutes at 3 AM to come fuck me in my neighbors treehouse
I like to listen to classical music when I eat taco bell. I think it cancels out the aura of poverty and desperation.
I'm not just straddling the line between love and hate, I'm dry humping the shit out of it
Randomize
