somehow in between the body shots the bong hits and trying to convince the 7-11 lady to let me fill up my vodka bottle with cherry slurpee. i misplaced my car.
So we fuck and I say, "I'm about to go." He tells me, "No, leave at ten.. just lay here for a little while." When I ask, "Why?!" He gets his feelings hurt and says, "ugh. or don't." Since when did guys start acting like girls?
Sometimes I seriously wonder if I could get away with vodka Sundays at work. Cuz this red bull feels naked.
You convinced us both to take shots of jack Daniels through our eyes.
I started drinking at around 8.. Started heavily drinking around 815.
I said:" get your jacket, get your beer and get the fuck out of here"
Firing someone with a rhyme is the new high point in my life.
You texted me 'I am the leopard prince', with a series of pictures of you posing in what seemed like cat poses. you were not "a little bit" drunk dude..
We really have to stop convincing people tazing is the cool thing to do.
I vaguely remember a pregnant lady reaching for my penis. When was I in an elevator?
As much as I enjoyed playing drunk half naked twister and talking about my daddy issues last time, I'll have to pass.
I think we ended 5-7 relationships as well this weekend...so another good stat
I just can't have sex in the car again. it's just too much
How was your night?
I spent a lot of money and drank a lot of booze. Also was part of a successful search party
yeah....try hearing them in person. it sounds like two muppets going at it
Can I say it was a great night out of town? Fucking my co-worker in the hotel bed while my best friend is fucking his friend on the floor and a random guy is laying in the other bed meanwhile we are all passing a joint back and forth
Randomize
