This row in front of you is like duck, duck, goose - but eating disorder, eating disorder, failed eating disorder
I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
Quiet hours sex sucks. I hate finals.
I did the seizure Bad Romance dance again last night, didn't I?
you were really good actually. your skill is increasing over time
He just said he was the Jesus of alcoholics.
Okay well someone asked "IS HE HOMELESS?" about me so I need to try and find somebody.
There are dudes in kilts outside my window practicing fire breathing with cheap vodka and a modified grill lighter. I thought you should know.
Why are there chunks of your hair in everyones pocket?
I decided to mark my territory.
I'm watching sex and the city with my wine and Wendy's. I'm not sure if this is single woman empowerment or not.
Next time you see his dad you should let him know you are now Eskimo brothers.
We just left the shoe. An app card to Fridays. $25 to santoras and a note that said sorry we were drunk on the front doorstep of the strip club
Doing the walk of shame at 1 AM. Stumbled across a rave. This night is epic.
my whole checking account just had a funeral down bourban street, paid for that, and then bought everyone 5 shots of fireball...
I think I'm the first girl to break a bed with a guy, without even having sex with him while doing so.
He licked me while I ate pretzels and chips. I was really living my best life.
Randomize
