I just pooped in his toilet and didn't flush...I desperately need to get him past the girls don't poop phase.
Bt dubs, I still have cuts on my arm from when you attacked me with a dildo on Saturday night.
I wish my dick could take responsibilities for his own actions
she kept checking the clock when she was giving me head and at midnight she said she had to stop because she cant eat meat on fridays is that bitch serious
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Can you check your dirty laundry bag for my tooth.
went for icecream. accidentally deepthroated it. my mom gave me a dirty look, but the kid behind the counter looked impressed
I'm ashamed of you 12 hours later and 200 miles away
The stripper had a daughter my age and offered to introduce us. I didn't know what to say to that.
On my way back to his place to see his "art". Why am I sure this is going to be nothing more than his dick in a box?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you remember Kelly my alter personality? She talked like a man and would sing amazing grace?
I hurt so much. Not in the emotional way, but in the I went to dive bars sorta way.
Well, my family didn't see me in my drunken super slut state at Summerfest, so there must be a God.
I repeat do not go to a jail visit drunk, those stools are easy to fall off.
Here's a concept though: eating pasta while getting laid
Just got caught by my boss looking at porn on the work computer & he decided to utilize this time to look with me. Not sure if this is good or bad.
Randomize