Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
stuffed animals make me feel really maternal.
You cheat on me once, shame on me. You cheat on me with a white girl, it's fucking over
I can hear my liver begging me not to go out tonight
I'm sorry. We set two Christmas trees on fire. Also the neighbor's yard. Also ours.
Your dad needs a mid life crisis affair thing, I could totally be that girl.
Where are you and why am I suddenly responsible for your taquitos?
You could become Eskimo brothers with my dad. How can you pass that up? You pussy.
Before we rave about the healing powers of your penis, remember it nearly killed me as well.
My day in three words: secret purse cake
She said it was unconventional for me to yell "Shazam!!" when I came inside her.
Remember when I made fun of you when you ran out of toilet paper on your brother's birthday and had to use coffee filters? Guess what happened today
It's like sleep walking but with blowjobs
YOU CAN'T GET A TATTOO BECAUSE OF KPOP FANFICTION. THAT'S NOT HOW LIFE WORKS
Sorry you ended up in detox. It's not my fault you decided to walk downtown in only your underwater at 3am. I think the tequila took over.
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