wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
we both passed out while playing beer pong, woke up in the morning and continued to play coffee pong to cure our hangovers
I guess you can say it's a tradition... whoever brings home the ugliest guy has to do all the cleaning the next day
he has officially spend more money on me than any other boy. and its all gone to plan b. awesome.
he keeps trying to sext me and all I can do is respond with descriptions of what im eating.
You flooded my bathroom while trying to construct a hot tub. All three of you were completely naked.
Hey Im running from the cops. hiding in a bush. when you're approaching the intersection honk the horn twice and I will come out.
Saturday at 4 is jello wrestling sponsored by the senior class council. That's why my school is awesome. Boom.
Guess I'll put him on my to-do list too. But closer to the bottom since we dated before. That's almost unethical.
You knew you'd end up at his house the minute you emptied the bowl of condoms into your purse.
Love that I’m sending my uber driver a thank you message for taking me home via mcdonalds tonight before I’m messaging my date from tonight! Lol
Well Jon got a DUI sleeping in the back seat so I thought the trunk was safer. BUT WHO CARES WHY JUSE PLEASE COME LET ME OUT!
As I walked across the lawn after the party got busted, an officer told me to chug my beer before I left the premises.
The blunt fell in the hottub, i mean i knew she was upset but i didnt expect her to dive for it and come up balling her eyes out...
What do you mean you haven’t had the fantasy of getting anally penetrated by a tentacle monster?
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