just tell him i said nine months
Thursdays are my worst days
but now we sippin champagne when we thirstay?
He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
TRUE LIFE: my roommate is growing a bush.
better yet, TRUE LIFE: my roommates boyfriend begged her to grow a bush.
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Been drinkin since 3, wearing a tutu, how could things go wrong
i just called. the lady was really nice. something tells me my schools clinic gets a lot of calls about chlamydia
Please please please tell me that is not a pringles container full of pee that your little brother just got a hold of.....
i was laying in her brothers bed, in his old room. and i kept getting the chills. i didn't know if it was a draft or the ghosts of BJ's past.
He's trying to impress me with how much money he makes. How does he know me so well?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm stealing this baby.
Well I always support illegal activity but where would you put it?
Just made a beer run. At 9am. In my pjs. I should not be graduating today
Just want to apologize again for asking to spot your form in the shower.
Btw I did not technically have a dick in me but I was naked in bed with a man during the last finals game so that is why the Warriors won
That female nurse who took a selfie with my man parts well I was out of it just got fired and arrested... You know all she had to do was ask lol
Also I've decided to start stealing shot glasses after I do the shots. You in?
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