I want the hot one, scratch that. anyone.
I feel great
I just peed on a car
So there is this guy preaching the word of God outside our club. I went up to him and said, "God made this body, and he made it for premarital sex." Sup, Hell?
open bar reception. dayglow. pray for me
If i pass out for a while at graduation, please atleast TRY to wake me?
Shroomed with my best friend'a dad at his wife's surprise birthday party so you can say I have experience in the field
he only noticed i dyed my hair purple like halfway through sex and he looked really shocked and he just said "You look like Barney." as he came.
Just shaved my crotch so I could call it the bald eagle. Happy 4th.
Random one night stand with a guy that had a USA tattoo on his ass. Can't possibly get more American than that
ED guy's penis finally worked last night. It was a Festivus miracle!
Maybe if I ever do become a counselor, I would just implement a kind of intensive meme therapy.
The stripper started talking about murdering people....that lapdance turned dark.....
Cheyanne in woods. Ducks attacked. My toe is bleeding. We are gpsing our way home on foot. No worries
It's weird having sex with someone you actually like
They were shocked that I could handle my liquor so well. I'm half Irish and half Russian. This is what I'm made for
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