My milkshake brings 85 to 90 percent of the boys to the yard
so the weed I found in my fridge is actually lettuce. tell jim I need that 5 bucks after all
it's not a party till someone uses the fire extinguisher.
Its like they don't get that I only talk to them before homecoming, thanksgiving, or any other time I go home. I love highschool girls.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Not sure why, but I was running back and forth across the road. Cab hit me and gave us a free ride home.
Just fucked in a kitchen. I never want my penis that close to knives, stoves, or blenders ever again.
I sent him a picture of my boobs instead of saying good morning. I'm trying to tell him how I feel in a language he'll understand.
Walk of shame dressed as a Christmas tree, it happened. Ho ho ho bitches
Hit on in the middle of a Wal-Mart McDonald's by a really awkward nerd. There is not enough nope in the world.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
YOU CANT FOOL THE TOILET
I just want to drink cheap wine and throw my bra at an aging singer songwriter
And I wasn't CONVICTED of a felony, I just committed one
He got you flowers. How bad can the sex really be?
I slept like a rock because of your dick. I'll thank him personally later.
You can’t homewreck what the Lord hath brought together.
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