you still trying to smash that chick?
it's a losing battle and she kinda sucks. been busy with school so not getting midweek drunk - she's nearly unbearable sober
she was screaming in french about how classy it was to be drinking wine. oh... she was drinking it out of the bottle. with a beer in her other hand while throwing up.
I'm bringing in a picture of a stranger on facebook to get my haircut. I have reached a new level of creepy.
When I start carrying a bottle in my hand, jumping from boat to boat with a grenade horn. YOU should know this isn't going to turn out well.
Everyone already knows you're a drunk, they understand.
Quick question, when did I develop feelings, and how can I make them go away?
That's two questions.
Ugh I miss culture and lesbians already
so far, I've observed him try to hit on 3 girls, 1 guy and a bar stool. Humanity is amazing from a sober point of view.
IS SOBER OCTOBER A THING?? WTF WHO ARE THESE PEOPLE?
It's whatever. Titanic is about to be on and we have wine, which is basically crying juice. Leo, Kate, and I will be having a lovely, pants free evening.
He told me I'm a small core of pure evil wrapped up in sweetness, gold, and puppies. He gets me.
That is beautiful
Everyone I slept with in 2016 is getting a Christmas card from me. Because I'm an adult.
I fucked her with a giant balloon tied to my dick. You tell ME how my night went
She asked what a chaser is. I died a little inside, please come back..
Sometimes I wish I could tell all my past/present hookups what the nicknames that my friends and I have assigned them.
I swear I have some evil slut demon in me when I'm blacked out
Don't we all.
Randomize
