He said he was from Mississippi and my vagina clamped shut like a frightened oyster
I would do things to you that would get us burned at the stake if we lived in a puritan village.
Why do you proceed to call me "Queen La Queefah?"
the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
Just an fyi, teatherball while wasted might be the hardest sport ever.
Word is he has some crazy hawaiian STD
once you started introducing yourself as "running-bear" i knew you were beyond fucked up
I may not have eyeballs after all the drunk naked people having sex outside.
I'm concerned that this blind man on the bus has a boner right now
Well I was going to go home but vodka happened.
I'm watching the Brazzers version of Mary Poppins and enjoying it. Volume on and all. 45 minutes.
turns out it took a Belgian couchsurfer dressed as Heisenberg to rock my world.
It's shark week go big or go home
I get off at 11. but they've been letting me go early cuz I've been crying a lot
I've been in town for almost 36 hrs and I haven't made out with a stranger yet - I consider THAT a record!
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