Omg. Budweiser tramp-stamp sighting @ Wal-mart. Best tattoo EVAR.
So I got a little fucked up on the punch, and made out with the family friend. Which is apparently morally reprehensible. I don't get that.
nutella sex= disaster
I can't believe I'm wasting this thong on a guy in a sweater vest.
the date was going great.. until he pulled down his pants and asked if there was any hair in between his cheeks.
Me and a lesbian played "may the best man win" over a bi chick tonight... I lost, still fun though
Please please please tell me that is not a pringles container full of pee that your little brother just got a hold of.....
remember.. you're not a homewrecker.. you're just creating options for him..
Hah no, But it might feel like water boarding to my soul
I have the most nasty and explicit wet dreams of my boss that I'm embarrassed to look him in the face. I'd be pregnant or promoted if he only knew
I put his pb&j sandwich in my bra and never looked back
Snow days are when you really appreciate that your neighbor is on your bang roster.
We are all done wearing pants today
Everything is fine, it's not hung over in here at all\n\n*Narrator* *but in fact everything was not fine*
She grabbed the other one and started playing tug-o-war against the blonde chick. I told you getting my nipples pierced was a good idea
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