when the lights went off, all i could see was the glowing of the camera light in the closet... i got the fuck out of there so fast.
So apparently when I was 2, I went around drinking everybody's beer at some wedding, then passed out in a corner....
This explains a lot.
There's a Sam Adams brew house. How were we not supposed to go
In the hospital waiting to be tested for the first uti of the school year....I'm BACK BTICHES.
So you used a whole package of smoked meat last night. Didn't eat it, just took it out and put it all over the fridge.
Well good for him for getting your number before he told you he had no money and needed you to pay for his drink!
Its official the day you get back into town we are having a going away to jail party for me. My last wish before prison is to shit faced drunk with you, get into a fist fight, and then cuddle up and fall asleep. Just like old times <3
Zombie crawl summary: 5 of 6 friends successfully laid. friend 6 too drunk to care and making out with a whale (not a costume)
And thanks to you I'm pretty sure I'm banned from every qdoba in south carolina. And cab company
As I was puking, these 2 guys started peeing next to me chanting me on
But seriously I might need help getting spray paint off of my body.... But don't worry about the penis I scrubbed him already
you asked the cab driver if he wanted to meet your parents, last night.
I think he's only dating me for my ass...
*goes to show prof a picture* *forgets tit pic is in camera roll*
I wiped my ass with a McDonalds wrapper. I've hit an all time low. Sorry for my impatience
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