R you on birth control?
No, why?
...no reason
last night I thought his shirt said yale... but this morning it definitely says old navy.
Yeah, we realized keeping you in a cage wasn't beneficial to us
fucking a dude
i mean: fucking a, dude
wow, that comma made all the difference there
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She said as long as i don't wake her up she doesn't care what hole i use.
Got yourself a keeper right there.
how the hell did we fit 12 drunk lesbians in your car?! I felt like we were playing lesbian tetris last night.
You're just mad at the fact that I want to be a car alarm.
I'm sorry for throwing the cheese everywhere, but it wasn't my fault. No one was enforcing disipline so not really my fault for not behaving
I would be the drunk girl eating cake on the front steps alone.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
DONT LET HIM GET NAKED. JUST SAY NO
I just got back to our room ....neither of us spent the night there but both our beds are occupied. send help.
It seems that only way I've actually improved myself after 2 years of writing for the school newspaper is that I've mastered the art of descriptive words to improve my sexting skills
"I'm looking more at his dick bulge." Never thought I'd hear those words come out of my boyfriend's mouth.
In other news, I just sent her a video of me masturbating while driving in the rain, so I guess you could say I've mastered Snapchat
I got a message the other day that just said “great tits”
A gentleman AND a scholar
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