how do chicks with those acryllic nails wipe their anuses?
I'm pretty sure if an eight year old calls you a whore.. it's true. just saying.
tip of the day : never have sex with a full bladder. it WILL lead to complications and a very unhappy partner.
So there is a guy driving a robot around the college of engineering selling energy drinks
Well if I am having twins, at least I'll finally have 2 kids by the same father.
My dinner guests were so drunk they never realized that I inadvertantly put Frosted Mini Wheats on the salad instead of crutons.
I need a second opinion on who's blood is in my car.
Seriously. He was just sitting there naked in the dark with a boner pissed that I came home late.
I just don't want to have to pretend at every family function she brings him to that he didn't hit on me first
she got into med school, i feel dumb for banging her dance major friend
It was fun, but I mean, any day that starts with shower tequila is bound to be good.
I guess I'll just chalk it up as a learning experience and a lot of great sex.
you called me drunk last night to talk about summoning sex demons with magic WTF
if i hadn't ended our catfight by hugging you one of us might be dead right now
my favorite part was when you kept waving @ that guy and insisiting it was your cousin..and it wasnt and wondering why he wasnt waving back lol you were legit PISSED
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