I dont get it-she has sex with me but wont be my facebook friend?
I have discovered something important. The trick to making food taste better is not always 'more hot sauce'.
We made a bong out of a plastic football. I can honestly say we make a good team.
It's like salsa. But with balls in it. I like to call it balsa
This may be hard to believe, but that wasn't the first time I was fingered under a snuggie
It's not
I will give you 100$, a blow job a day for a month and I will shave my legs according to societal standards until next November if you come recuse me from my night class right NOW.
I would have gladly let him decapitate me with the way he was biting on my neck.
One of the art pieces was basically this chick throwing raw meat at the audience, anyone who got hit (which I did) got a free shot of whiskey. It was worth it.
But I'm currently thinking of all my bad decision making last night and giving myself a time out.
of fours songebofy did dknt stop believing
how legible are my texts
Nothin ruins a fine afternoon like shitting ur pants
Dude...itll be a youre-still-a-dick-but-a-hot-one-angry-hate-evil-spite kinda fuck. This is acceptable.
got cock blocked by the cops again. two of the cops were the same ones from that t bell incident and they recognized me... they still dont like me
Woke up at 5am in an elevator... Pretty much tells you how my weekend went.
Didn't know my clit could produce that many orgasms in one night. Fuck my husband; think I might have to become a lesbian.
Randomize
