He looks like the kind of guy that would jack off to weird things.
well considering we left the bathroom with the mirror off the wall, a bloody nose, and clothes all messed up they assume im just a coke whore now..
I can hear her blowing you man. All I hear is her saying 'yeah' over and over again.
Apparently Bin Ladens last act of terrorism is cock blocking me....
Well, at least he doesn't refer to you as his associate. his mattress associate
You can't say "they have anal bleaching for that" and then just hang up
I woke up using a pile of socks as a pillow. I think theyre clean so thats a plus.
Yeah. He can't come because his mom found the pizza box under his bed with my underwear in it. He acted confused, guess because i forgot to tell him..
The date officially concluded on the phrase "Nosh dat vag".
If we're single and alone together, the fuck angels shall sing upon our nude bodies.
Is it wrong i wouldn't sleep with him because his boxers said #1 dad all over them?
What are your thoughts toward getting nasty in a minivan?
WHAT IF I SAT OUTSIDE AND STARTED SCREAMING THE LYRICS TO O CANADA WOULD THAT FIX IT
PLEASE DON'T
I'm supposed to be at work in 10 min, I just woke up and am 45 min away...tinder for the win
He looks like Aladdin, and that's about all he's got going for him.
Randomize
