we are all sexual creatures
yea maybe. but you're not. you're not getting any.
You closed the sidewalk off to pedestrians last night. With a glitter covered safety cone
stop calling my apartment porn island.
it was funny though when you first woke up you pointed at my shoe and said i need my jacket and then put my shoe on your hand
I think thats the most anyones ever pregamed for rollerskating
I got a Cease & Desist email from NBC for downloading Bruno. I am not going down for gay porn.
Look at the bright side...I have an 11 inch penis
there has got to be a maximum amount of semen a person can take in before they get some kind of poisoning.
Yes my plan is to drink the college out of me so i can be an adult by monday
Life lesson today, a six foot hot guy I meet at a party CANNOT fit on my bike with me.
Sorry, they don't make maternity Power Ranger suits...
Ok not good, my info has definitely been submitted to this sugar daddy website before.
I'm not sure drinking my way through west nile virus is the best idea. Oh well, already committed to that plan.
I just used my dick as to measure where my desk would go because I don't have a tape measure or a ruler.
a girl walked up to me and asked if you were my brother. she shook her head and said 'im so sorry' when i said yes. what did you fucking do????????
Randomize
