Situation: He got it in my eye, how long do I let it sting before should start to worry?
hahhahahha. mid doggie-style, i faked an asthma attack. the sex was that bad
my coke dealer is running a Black Friday special
It's not fair. Guys with dicks that huge should not be allowed to be catholic.
I'm kind of concerned that there are now two different videos of me with knives
We sent off fireworks off in the taco bell drive through. They're taking it way too seriously.
You don't understand. This could be the last time I shave a star into my vag. Get over here.
Is it too early to start pregaming for St. Patty's?
Today I found out that my boss keeps a breathalyzer on his desk for just these sort of shenanigans
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
all I know is id definitely throw up if you guys ever dated so if you do stay the fuck away from me
You kept telling everyone that you were as sober as a camel. I have yet to figure out what that means
It’s 830 am and the amount of Valentine’s Day snaps I’ve already seen makes me either want to vom, drink a bottle of wine, or buy chocolate
1000% No lie I was just looking on insta and was thinking about taking a bottle of wine to the face..
After we fucked we sat in bed and watched Charlie St. Cloud and he fed me ice cream. It was probably the most romantic thing I've ever done.
She kept telling me that it pissed her off that i expect people to make out with me...then she made out with me. Win?
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