Why does lindsey know I was naked in the kitchen?
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
He set an alarm on my phone to an infant screaming and puking to make sure i take my pill. its working.
So getting drunk in honor of the bomb threat is legit right?
He got completely naked and is now just standee there next to my bed poking at my hamster. Why can't I get sex the normal way.
Alright, who started the "how long till dereck gets deported from Australia" pool? I want in on that.
he brought with him gifts of cookie dough and penis. upgrading our relationship from fwb's to bf/gf was an incredibly smart merger.
So is the trick to long distance communication to be drunk during phone conversations?
my life is turning into trapped in the closet at way too fast a speed for me to feel comfortable.
Yeah, great now I will be tampon girl
no it was
but you compared your dick to a female disney character
You went to pound town last night and chow town this morning. Boy you need a passport.
honestly performing my own hysterectomy would hurt less than my cramps right now.
Walking back to my car from the campus library and just saw a Nuva Ring on the sidewalk. If that doesn't scream college life, idk what does.
I may or may not have puked near a bear on the side of the road this morning.
Randomize
