This girl looks like a mixture of kathy griffin and bill walton. i havent decided if that is a good thing.
I was in a gas station that sold tazers and I just saw a billboard that said "Strippers, need we say more?" God I love Georgia!
No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
I just had one of those moments where i was really sad that i'll never get to be asian.
They let you pick the name that they announce for you at graduation. The professional world needs to prepare itself for papa smurf mcdonald.
Just coat-checked 2 backpacks full of 40's...it was the bouncer's idea.
No, you always delete them without reading. Enjoy the virtue of morning innocence. What are you doing today.
I wasn't trying to be rude when I hurriedly walked past you, but I can not put in to words exactly how bad I had to shit.
guy next to me on the train just pulled out two bottles of gin and a block of cheddar. is slowly making his way through all of them.
Omg have I shown you my skeezy ex fiancée?
The other one.
I want to be "performing a disservice to society by actually wearing clothes in public" hot.
we are not taking body shots with the irish cream
The Wolf of Wall Street “I ain’t fuckin’ leaving!” speech when the cops broke up your party though...
my one night stand just gave me money "to buy a better vibrator" tis the season
I feel like you're encouraging me to commit a felony.
I feel like you're wasting time.
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