Woke up this morning at my parent's house. No idea how I got here... what happened last night? Was it bad?
We using my standards or yours?
Thank God for loud music. There is a circus in my butt right now.
I just saw a commercial that said "call your doctor if erections last more than 4 hours". I said "disgusting" and my mom said "I know, i hate when that happens." Get me out of here.
As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
Plotting your own moral demise should not be this fun
At the airport and im So hungover. Think anyone will help if I put a note on me reading "flying to Boston, please wake me as we board" and then passing back out?
Do you think the neighbors will know I was the one giving out the penis shaped lollipops to the children?
I drunken agreed to go wedding dress shopping with a stranger at the bar yesterday. She sent me an email asking what days I am free.
Hey dude this is some next level no homo shit but im gonna get 2 tickets to the opera and go Hail Mary on this one girl. U take the extra ticket if i fail.
Is it just me, or do you see your penis in that hand?
I'm sending lingerie pics that I took yesterday. I fully prepared for this holiday
I think him and kristen are pretty serious now.. I dont think he cheats on her, anymore.
he's spending the night tonight. if i can walk straight tomorrow i'll be pissed.
Feels weird riding an elevator with my tongue in my own mouth.
Did I penguin dive down a hill last night?
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