So it's like pop-o-matic trouble, but with penises
found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
I have realized now that neither the top nor bottom of a bunk bed is safe for sex....
maybe next time you shouldn't be drinking alone watching intervention at 3 am and no one would think you needed an intervention.
Nada. Shooting off confetti and wanted to see I'd u could see it from ur house.
Wow. Its not even 11am.
If he thought that flying across an ocean to visit me in London constituted sex, he thought wrong.
Thank God I didn't lose my virginity to that asshole. That woulda been like winnin a raffle ticket for a free bag of dog shit. But with like a really pretty bag. A pretty bag full of dog shit.
My phone autocorrects "pooping" to "popping" and I'm like DO YOU EVEN KNOW ME??!
Besides the one of you shaking your cock for 10sec that was one of the best snapchat's ever haha
I need to start a penis folder so I stop "accidentally" showing people my junk. On a side note- St. Pattys penis was a hit, four leaf clover and all.
It's really life affirming to be at a wedding thinking wow I took your husbands virginity
Let's just say that I took off my pants and I had superman boxers on. Then she took off her pants and she had batman panties on. I think she's the one!
Nothing like walk of shaming to the bus stop in your bar clothes at noon and seeing the fire truck you work on drive past with the other shift giving you thumbs up.. Brotherhood at its finest
Partying with my eighth grade history teacher I know you're jealous
All I can remember from last night was eating nutella and touching myself to Weird Science.
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