Canada just beat USA, the sad part they still need us to make money so who really won
Whoever decided putting Tom Seizmore and Heidi Fleiss together in rehab should win some kind of award.
it's to the point where working 2 jobs this summer will absolutely not cover how much i will spend on alcohol next semester.
I'm not being over dramatic, but I think my heart is going to stop beating.
I just had my first non-cocaine-induced nosebleed for the first time in 2 years. This calls for a celebration.
It's a goat... but where the fuck did it come from?
The guy at the door just stared only at my boobs and said "I'm gonna let you in." 'Merica
I feel like parents watching our children. You want to step in and help them but you just have to let them make their mistakes
I'm worried about how taking care of my mom's dog while being on acid will go.
He was playing minecraft so I took a shower with my vibrator
He called me khaleesi while I rode his dick. He wins
There is a cooked ham in the washing machine.
i feel like a cleansing fire is the only way to purify the house
Hurry I'm alone dressed like a prostitute eating French fries.
It was probably the night you were half naked and trying to blow everybody, guy or girl.
this is me we're talking about here. You're going to have to be more specific than that.
Randomize
