He is such a slut. More and more my type.
you're the one who masterbates every night to the titanic soundtrack
i don't think my family understands the severity of a twenty first birthday.
I just blindly shoved it in. I'm still not sure which hole I got.
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his penis is PERFECT
I want to put it in a shoebox and place cottonbls around it to protect it from any harm
or knit it little hat
THEY'RE. IN. YOUR. BED. THEY RANDOMLY SHOW UP. AND GET IN YOUR BED.
Got a blowie from her in the cab on the way home. Made awkward eye contact with the cabbie who said, and I quote "Keep the mess in her mouth bro", I did so only out of respect
My day may involve a drug pinata. I LOVE MY LIFE.
He just walked in the house and decided to wake everyone up by yelling "I SHIT MYSELF!" We all thought he was joking....we were all wrong.
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That's not fair! You can't come over after you just had sex and rub my dry spell in my face!
I got really upset about missing him last night when I was demonstrating penis sizes of the people I've slept with using a tape measurer to my roommates
learning about efficiency and effectiveness in an administration seminar. real world application: walking across the street to the pub on break to shotgun a beer.
I'm gonna write a book entitled "when you give a cop a cookie..."
I don't even want to know.
By the way, you're like fucking spiderman. I've never seen someone climb out of a car window that fast and eloquently.
Fucker was flying a Bruins flag. He can pick up the dog's poop himself.
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