i dont care that its taken 20 hrs to pee without hurting, BEST HATE SEX EVER.
Hm. I declare blue a flavor.
He looked at me like he has never had a girl throw up on him before.
And then she was like, "don't do anything. No blow jobs, don't let him stick his fingers in weird places because people have germs."
I'm not judging you... I'm judging our friendship
took adderall before wrapping presents, ended up making paper snowflakes for two hours
I poured everyones drinks into the ice bucket and then stuck my face in it. Apparently I'm a greedy drunk.
My clothes are covered in blood and I feel like I drank a gallon of elephant cum...it's safe to say I'm hungover
2 hours later, she made her cat watch the waterfall scene from Homeward Bound to teach her how good she has it here.
There's a guy in a life size dick costume, and two guys with white shirts that are each half if a pair of breasts in a red bra lol. They came separate but when they saw each other there was some titty fucking in the street, it's only 11
I vaguely remember a drunken mid sex pinky promise to not let it get weird.
i just added a shot of fireball to my iced coffee. goodbye sobriety.
side note: on a scale of 1-10, how bad an idea is it to hook up with 9 cats guy?
Operation terrify all men while simultaneously make them fall in love with me is going quite swimmingly so far
I swear he is my soulmate. He kept feeding me goldfish while we were fucking. Who wouldn't enjoy that while having sex.
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