After you pregamed and were plastered you saw the cop was parked illegally so you gave him a citizens arrest
just used a paint mixing cup as a shot glass. thank u art school.
My mom just walked in on me and my girlfriend about to have sex. All she said was "You're lookin like a fool with your pants on the ground.."
Make puking fun. Chug half a monster right before you blow. Throw up foam. Most unique experience ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I would ask what did you do but I feel like who did you do is probably more appropriate
He was my shower sex Sherpa last night. And we both made it safely up the mountain.
I took the weekend off because he and I were supposed to go to Vegas for our anniversary and get a hooker remember?
Ah, yes. Who says romance is dead?
I HAVE to find her. I've got a pretty decent pic of her footprint on my headboard. Wonder if I can get one of the podiatry majors to help?
Dude, I passed out on the side walk, lost my phone and shirt, and walked 12 miles home after I disappeared from the club
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We can't shop at Hobby Lobby anymore. They don't like Plan B which basically runs through our veins.
im not letting a little injury get in the way of my alcoholic/drug problems. we ARE getting turnt tonight.
Hello my rib-scented angel!
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
my mom talks about my drinking like its a problem and yet this morning she fills me a solo cup with champagne for the shower.
I wish drug dealers had sales for the holidays
Randomize