I just pooped in his toilet and didn't flush...I desperately need to get him past the girls don't poop phase.
Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
you threw up out the window, wiped your face with a twenty dollar bill, and threw that out the window too.
did we at least go back and get it?
how else do you think we got jack in the box...?
Homegirl just dropped a candle on the floor major party foul. Thought it make you feel better.
Just saw my bank statement. It literally goes liquor store pizza place liquor store pizza place bar bar bar liquor store pizza place 711 for snacks withdrawl for drugs rinse and repeat
That bitch ruined vodka saturday
nothing can ever be as bad as the night i blacked out, updated my fb status to i need a pity fuck and then passed out for 13 hours.
Dad and I are shitfaced screaming at Canadians in Walmart. Life is good.
Is valentines day the worst or best day to ask for a threesome? I'm weighing some options on this high-risk manoeuvre.
That's the 3rd guy I've made pass out from a bj. I may have super powers.
Nothing like a dick pic from your fave ex to make you audibly exhale sadly.
Please tell me im imagining that i claimed that i was king of the ducks.
I use my feet as sexual weapons
I shaved my asshole for this. That's real dedication.
No, I told him I was busy again this weekend. Eventually he’ll learn. Plus, absence makes the cock grow harder
Randomize
