Why are you at a bar in Connecticut?
Long story. One that now involves lots of delicious chicken wings om nom nom
I cant wait for the day that I tell my daughter I named her after my favorite porn star.
That's the first time you've ever said the L word without referring to drinking or partying.
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
Using the ceiling fan to slice the hotdogs in mid-air can only be contributed to our liberal use of 1800.
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
He ripped off his shirt and tried to give me CPR. That damn bong.
I did sing regulators with a random black dude at The Rail without looking at the screen, hugged him and walked off stage. I pretty much live up to all expectations.
I think I may have accidentally stepped in fire
He's like a fucking cake pop, the greatest thing in the world while it lasts, but it never lasts for long enough
I'm convinced he's the patron saint of oral sex
Crowning achievement. I bought ranch dressing and emergency contraception.
Consider yourself lucky. If I ever run into my ex, all I'll be able to think is, "I let you pee on me and lead me around on a leash."
He's watching Always Sunny and eating refried beans straight from the can.
It wasn't my fault.
You let her suck your neck. Yes it was your fault.
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