Whod you bang
So thats when I found out ur supposed to put the penut butter on your balls not your dogs balls, feels alot better
It feels like he gave my taint an indian burn.
she made my bed before she left. i think i'm gonna keep banging her to get the housework done
I Just paid off the bartender to help me convince this chic my roommate's gay. This is the best cockblock ever.
It's amazing the difference a day and 2000 mg of antibiotic make. Nine days to go.
You said your face felt like it was made out out of boxes and kept asking me to give you a bath.
ALSO, bringing a stapler to the bar is a good idea
I just sold my hat for three car bombs. I call that a win.
Well, if you're getting/have gotten your dick sucked, you're welcome. If not, I tried. Step up your game, pussy. I pulled a MacGuyver and got mine. No excuses bro.
2 things: 1) can you get hep from toilet water? And 2) do you know where we can get a new skillet for cheap?
Please tell me those aren't related.
I made rice.
"I'm looking more at his dick bulge." Never thought I'd hear those words come out of my boyfriend's mouth.
Why r u in my phone under "the last survivor"?
I crawled to the bathroom this morning there were cornpops scattered on the floor? What was I doing last night?
I accidentally stubbed my dick
What does that even mean?
Randomize
