wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
he just had his sister send me a message about how he's not a creeper
Was his mother too busy breastfeeding him to do it?
Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
How in the hell did I take a shot of whiskey to the eyeball last night?
If it snows I'm just gonna sit at my house in my costume and drink beer by myself all night.
You should be proud. How many people can say they GAVE a stripper an std?
Just watched a deer get gangbanged in my front yard by 5 bucks. Wtf animal kingdom
I just learned my tits were fire resistant. I should join the freakin circus
It was an "I snuck in through the window at 5am with my underwear in my pocket" kind of night.
Pierced my own nipple last night, and yes everyone did go absolutely nuts
I'll pass on that plan. The lack of my penis in new vaginas is no where on the itinerary.
I just drank beer out of an old Vicodin bottle hoping to catch some residue. That's how finals week is going
I'm covered in jizz and the toll booth lady knew it
Do you know how hard it is to have sex on an air matress while there are people sleeping in the same room?!?!?
Randomize
