See it, we're so close, i smell your vagisil
if you google earth my address you can see me getting out of my car. finally my moment of being famous
He says he's "masters drunk." And if that's anything like "kentucky derby drunk" I know enough to not go over there.
and yes, the jail cell in Citi Field does have a big Mets symbol in it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just saw a half naked, drunk, 6th grade math teacher throwing small children around to the Titanic soundtrack.
What kind of wedding is this and why wasn't I invited
After I threw him out he walked down the street peeing in stride. I almost wanted to let him back in.
I can't wait to go to grad school so I am not your high unemployed friend.
I don't know, I kept pretending that I was riding an elephant during. It was actually really fun, but you can't tell him that!
Dont judge the spank bank, just be happy that you were deposited there.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My sexual preferences tend to require a degree in psychology to understand
he took a fucking pitcher of koolaid and vodka to the bath with him... i wake up from my blackout to his roomate screaming cause he spilled it and passed out in the middle of a blood red tub. she thought he killed himself. jesus christ its only the first day of break and i already regret coming home
Is it sad the checkout lady had to inform my mom she can't buy alcohol before 8am?
Im bringing my light up rubber ducky just in case we end up at a rave tonight. HE CHANGES COLOR!
I JUST WANT TO SIT IN MY UNDERWEAR AND WATCH THE BRAVES GAME AND NOT BE CONSTRAINED BY MY ED SHEERAN SHORTS
Umm I might be late. Also I am may or may not have mayonnaise on my ass
Randomize