what happened last night??
everyone saw ******'s vagina
and that's just the beginning
As a driver I hate pedestrians, and as a pedestrian I hate drivers, but no matter what the mode of transportation, I always hate cyclists.
this text is just filler to avoid a lull in the conversation
we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
Reason #1 for no sex outdoors: Mosquito bites. Awkward, awkward mosquito bites.
James and whatshisface bought me drunks. I am drinks.
and then some norwegians asked us to be in their porno.
she gave me head while wearing a sombrero and told me it was her "welcome to south of the border" blowjob. i am never leaving mexico.
I just want to have sex and eat oreos. and then take body shots. like everyday.
Girl. There is the cutest old gay here. He's approximately 100 years old and kind as shit.
Does this mean I don't have to apologize for launching about 20 bead necklaces at you from the balcony?
I had to hypnotize my roommate last night so there's that.
Instead of a fine and a few hours in jail he chose to get tasered, break his neck and shit his pants
We just broke up and deleting his dick pics is the hardest thing I've ever had to do.
Randomize
