with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
Update, blind date is cute and fun.
Scratch that, blind date just threw up.
Just cropdusted the office
Dude, I just saw a sixteen year old girl in a catholic school uniform buying a pregnancy test... With a coupon!
Dude someone is playing the piano in the other room while I shit and it's making it really peaceful
Just found the video that explains the neighborhood applause. Your landlord is awesome, and the clothes are on the roof
had to split buying plan b over two cards. I will no longer challenge people to get on my level
There was a staple in my grits at waffle house last night. My knees are bruised as hell. And I puked pink all over my bathroom. Gooood night.
Hope I didn't wake u up but I woke up and there is a shirt, boxers, belt and jeans on my balcony, along with a naked guy who claimed to scale the building
I mean, I Just Had Sex in 4 on her top 25 most played list. That's got to give you some indication
I had to bail out of the tour de Franzia because I have class Saturday morning. Grad school is ruining my life
First morning at school this semester and I threw up in a bush during my walk of shame.
Nothing ruins an orgasm faster than accidentally calling out his boss's name
I think someone is dead in a car across the street
Scratch that, dude's getting a blow job
I'm classy like audry Hepburn. Chugging wine out of the bottle on the way to the club. Shed do that. I know she would.
Randomize
