you wouldn't even come home last night... Dead to me
I need to go to a fraternity... my boobs are telling me to.
I was thinking about baking his mom "sorry you found out i was sleeping with your son" cupcakes
I stayed up for hours making sure you didnt pass out in a mountain of your own puke. But when I heard you yell AWWWW FUUCCKK, somehow I knew everything would be ok
The 9th floor RA wants to know why we stacked 21 cinder blocks in the shower, and I can't remember. Do you?
I want a nosebag of coke after my exam. Like what horses have. Coked up horses. No excuses. I love you.
I just couldn't load the family groceries on to the same seat where I had sex 12 hours ago.
Take advantage man but know that every anal bead u drop inside her will make her love u 2% more. It's science
Honestly, I've had enough of his asshole to last me the new year.
Please tell me you're talking about his personality.
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
One small step for man, one big gay fierce leap for gays!
What is your life?
A tangled mess of finals and bad decisions.
The cops just came to this party I'm at and ate all of our snacks
Dude just crushed our bbq lays and told us to quiet down
Shroomed with my best friend'a dad at his wife's surprise birthday party so you can say I have experience in the field
No dude shes like 5 feet tall and maybe 100 pounds... Normally i wouldnt be scared but someone gave her a bat. Thats why im in the bathroom
Randomize
