Bike broken, reschedule party till thursday:(
who let me buy 6 packs of big league chew? and eat them all? thats not cool
just saw your exgirlfriend at the mall. her sister is pretty hot.
called that a week into the relationship. like driving off the lot with a 2010 and seeing the 2011 models coming in on the truck.
vodka bottle broke. scooping it out of the plastic tub with a shot glass into a sprite bottle using a ziplock bag as a funnel and straining the glass out with paper towels. good thursday night?
Its great. Every time she starts barking i know ive got approximately 37 seconds to hide my gf in the closet and throw some clothes on
Just pissed by glowstick light. Bad idea.
Nobody in the ambulance liked me...
I thought monday through wednesday was a YOLO free zone.
May 25th. Drunk Laser Tag party to celebrate our bdays. May 26th. Mushrooms at Chattanooga Aquarium. Damn
The bottle of Wild Turkey is empty and there is a pile of wet cement in the garage. What happened?
But I don't wanna live with them bc I need to be able to walk around naked and sex on any surface guilt free.
I had sex in an engineering office last night. So that could be your life. I was mounted on top of a sketch of a future parking lot for a maintenance building. If that's not romantic, idk what is
Any sexual interaction is meaningless without pizza during half time.
you're welcome to come here, except my beds from ikea so it's more unstable than i am
I just took a picture of Austin's dick wearing a hat. Except its not a hat it's a DayQuil cap.
Randomize
