i finally understand why guys leave in the middle of the night.......they got it right
There are 3 pics of me on my camera, naked, wearing only an apron, scooping ice cream.
We're cuddling on the couch that me and his brother had sex on...this feels wrong
I don't know how I'm boarding the plane tomorrow. I have my car registration.
Just put a sign on a baby carriage that says "all daddy wanted was a blowjob" might get fired.
Beware of calls from Dad. I just had a longer than I would care to admit convo about the ididarod. Apparently it starts tomorrow.
Just write off about 10000+ brain cells and 6 months of your lifespan.
Sounds like a normal friday night
duuuude the clock in this car says its 85 past 19.
dear god, who put you in a cab?
plus there's no nice way to tell a guy you physically hate the shape of their cock.
Last night at McDonalds, you lied across the counter, pulled up your shirt and yelled "BODY SHOTS"...
I'm truly not mad that he's at a strip club, it's that he couldn't look far enough into the future to figure out how to get himself home from one
I need to wash the frat house off of me
I love everything about him! His penis, his hair, his tattoos, his penis, his cat, his penis.
I just need to find someone whose kink is financial submission.
You could cut the tension with my nipples.
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