haha you were like: "I don't want to uh pressure you.." as you took your own shirt off
you know when i was in school the girls definitely did not have the tits the 15 year olds have now. so unfair.
overheard a conversation between 2 lesbians: 'back when I used to have dick sex...' oh, vegas, I so heart you
If there's ever a time when I've matured to the point that I don't want to look at camera-phone-titties, go ahead and bury me in a shallow grave by the railroad tracks.
we boned then he told me that he had a thing for my gay roommate. worst night ever
We tried to get a ride from the same firefigters that were turning off the fire alarm going off at our house.
You know its a good sign when a girl asks who everyone is AFTER she flashes her tits to the room.
guess who's eating a vending machine cheese danish, has no panties on, and is still the classiest bitch at this bus stop?
He threw me a bud light and when I opened it he smacked it out of my hand because "Dave giveth, and Dave taketh away". WTF
you came out with your cock in between the legs of a balloon animal. Maybe she'll think you have a sense of humor.
What kind of balloon animal was it?
So ahh..."Multicultural Night" turned into "Fuck the Neighbor Night"
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
im dying and naked and this is what youre living with next year.
I have found random beers stashed in my purse and microwave... Apparently I thought 2015 was gonna have a beer shortage
We literally laid down in the back of my car and had sex in a parking lot and it was in the top 3 best moral-less decisions I've made.
Randomize
