Afterwards she curled up in my dog's bed and slept there all night
How mad was your dog?
I don't understand how anyone could look at him and think, 'Yeah, that's a good idea.'
You stuck your head out the window to puke and got hit with a mailbox.
id like to know how you successfully locked me in your backseat last night
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
Girl passed out in class and vomited. Another victim of syllabus week
If I sleep with another Spanish guy it is officially renamed my senor year.
I'm just gonna plan on never getting a bf. everything I touch turns to gay
You were telling me last night 101 proof was nothing and you needed 400 proof or better yet military or marine proof, because you're marine grade.... You rascal.
I'm puking in a turkey pan....
I'll just be sleeping in this laundry room. Come get me at bar close.
Fell asleep in the library, woke up because I almost let out a sleep fart. That was close.
Also I like this area. Lots of places for me to get tacos.
You know when your cat drags a dead bird into the the house as a present and drops it at your feet looking all pleased because it thinks you'll be pleased? That's what sex with him was like.
I am putting clothes on to go find a brownie
In my experiences, brownies are better naked.
Sorry I fucked your cousin. Again. I just wanted him to take me on his boat.
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