She said I was really immature but whatever...oh by the way we just bought a toilet and turned it into a beer bong so come over
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
Having sex with the stobe light on was the best bad idea I've ever had.
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
you would not believe what I got pierced last night...
son, I feel like that is a phrase a father never wants to hear.
he was persistant. I supposedly owe him a bj from high school.
I just sold my mom a dimebag. Should I feel scared or sucessful?
We glued Jenga blocks together, called it "magic blocks" and sold it to the stoners for $50 and a bottle of Henny
looking at that huge scar on my leg from when i got drunk at 9 AM and walked into a grill. so excited for football season to start again!
I just remember going to take a piss and looking down on the floor and thinking "that looks comfortable" and then I was out.
Thanks for putting up with my drunk friend last night. Its all fun and games till someone pukes macaroni under your fridge.
Ugh I feel like I just got hit by a big giant sex bus.
Well the good news of being walked in on, my mom says your tits are pretty. Then she added that hers were like that once. Fml
But actually he solved 40% of my life problems just in one dicking
Staff meetings will be awkward since my boss and I both did the new intern
Maybe she doesn’t know you did him
Oh she definitely knows - it was a threesome
Please tell me you’re not taking life advice from porn scripts again
Randomize
