Do you think if I drink bleach they will let me leave work?
I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
I would blow Magic Johnson for a pack of lucky strikes right now. Post-hiv.
last night you decided it was time to "get organized" and "straighten out your life." You pulled out a bag of troll dolls, sorted through them and got nostalgic. You demanded both andy and i take one and keep it forever.
He said he had a gf but the monogamy was "only implied".
there are too many children here to make this hangover-friendly
Omg I'm so stupid. All the peoples fb status that said "spain" I thought they were all going to spain.......
I banged her roommate when she was gone. She came back with a chicken sandwich and a bj. Then she said " smells like my roommates vagina" I think I can get a threesome tonight
Held my professor's hair back while she was puking. I'd better get an A out of this or else the pics are going on Facebook.
Is this girl REALLY making a smoothie in the bathroom right now?
Its summer. Time to get to the freshmen before the weight does.
yea sometimes its awkward. but when you're a straight bartender at a gay bar and everyone knows it, they all think that they can make me turn gay. its like oh yea dude that extra $20 tip makes me want to suck some dick now
If it exists, I've probably pregamed it.
How did they ever let a trainwreck like myself run a bar?!
I want a dick in my left hand and a Crunch Wrap Supreme in my right hand.
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